1.
You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of
federal funding.
2.
You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th
graders how
to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
3.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding
Americansare
more of a threat, than US nuclear weapons technology, in the
hands of
Chinese communists.
4.
You have to believe that there was no art before Federal
funding.
5.
You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected
by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more
affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
7.
You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion
on demand.
8.
You have to believe that businesses create oppression and
governments create prosperity.
9.
You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but
loony activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.
10.
You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than
actually doing something to earn it.
11. You have to believe the military, not corrupt politicians,
start wars.
12. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports
certain parts of
the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports
certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees
are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria
Steinmen are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General
Robert E. Lee or
Thomas Edison.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist,
but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.
16. You have to believe Hillary Clinton is really a lady.
17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't
worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't
been in charge.
18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong
in jail, but
a liar and sex offender belongs in the White House.
19. You have to believe that transvestites and bestiality
should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding
by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of the United States.
21. You have to believe that this letter is part of a vast
right wing conspiracy.
